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The New Gossip Columnists

Oprah Snoops: Bad Bad Audience....

I can't lie to you folks, yes I read gossip tabloids, like US weekly, and I'm not ashamed. I enjoy them because it takes me away from my own mundane stresses to the glamorous stresses of celebs. But even in the celebrity gossip world I believe there must be standards adhered to. Yet as time goes by it becomes ever more apparent, unfortunately, that the fine line between journalism and gossip columnists has become very blurred. Lately I have noticed an interesting new filter for media and gossip mags, and that filter is audiences members from television shows, particularly the Oprah show. Last week when Jennifer Aniston was on I read an article about her appearance before the show actually aired. In the article audience members from the show were quoted informing the media about what was said on the show.

For example:

Aniston 37, who showed Room 10, the short film she co-directed as part of Glamour magazine's "Reel Moments" series, said that contrary to rumour, she and Vaughn, 36, have not split (and are not engaged), audience member Rochelle Alfaro says.

Question: Who the hell is Rochelle Alfaro?

Example 2:

According to audience member Margaret Stent, Aniston also said she hadn't gotten breast implants, as one tabloid reported, explaining that when she gains weight, it goes to her chest. Aniston rolled her eyes when asked about Vaughn, adds Stent.

This woman (Ms. Margaret Stent) decided to talk about Aniston's facial expressions. Taking it to a whole new level.

But the actress made it clear that she and Vaughn are "still on," says Suzanne Hartigan, who traveled from Georgia to Chicago for the taping and adds that Aniston is "just as beautiful as she is in pictures." Hartigan's pal Debi Musgrave, who says Aniston wore a black tiered skirt and tank top, seconds that the actress was "more beautiful in person, and very real."

Here we have a gossipy audience member trying to top her friends quote "Jenn is more beautiful in person" (hoping her quote will also make it in the magazine I bet).

And today I read an article about Madonna's appearance on Oprah (airing tomorrow) and yet again audience members are being quoted.

According to a member of the Oprah audience, Madonna said she was startled by press reports about the toddler's father, Yohane Banda, who was quoted last week as saying he didn't realize he was signing away custody of his son, David, "for good.''

"She said she met with the father, she looked him in the eye,'' audience member Sheryl Lewis recounted.

Another Oprah audience member, Amanda Bannon of Crawfordsville, Ind., told ABC News that "the biggest thing was that Madonna wants to get the point across that she doesn't want this to be a discouragement to other families to not adopt.''

Who the hell has given these audience members permission to leak Oprah shows before it has even aired. Does Oprah know about this? Are there reporters hiding in the audience or waiting outside to quickly get quotes as the audience leaves? Call me traditional but I think it is disgusting that these attention starved busy bodies think its okay to leave an un aired show and leak information to the media, and be so happy about it that they actually give their real names.

Then again what if this is a conspiracy and writers are watching the shows and simply making up names to cover up everything. Well, call me teachers pet, even a brown noser but I will be prominently letting Oprah know about what's been happening (via e-mail which she will never respond to, or even look at of course, but at least I tried). And for those gossipy audience members out there, shame on you.

Die Desperate Cliche's, Die... and other News

It's been a long time folks...a long time.

Recently there have been so much stuff in the news that made me want to get up and blog, but I was to busy actually writing (and getting paid who woulda thought) to blog. So here we go my pent up rant on the world...

Rats, Roaches and Race...somethings just don't die

My first shake my head moment this week came when Survivor announced that they would be "spicing" it up this season, by dividing the tribes by ethnicities, yes ethnicity. Their will be a Hispanic, Asian, Black and White tribe. I could not say I was really surprised by this "juicy" announcement. Survivor, in the last throes of its run, is obviously grasping at straws they would never have gone for seasons ago, when they still had some fire left in them. It's like your boyfriend offering to go to couple therapy after you've already started dating someone else, a desperate, sad and sorta scary attempt at winning back your interest.

It's going to be soooo interesting to see how they cast each tribe. My bets are on a heavy set Feisty middle age Black woman, named Laquisesha (with lots of attitude), a young Christian "can't we all just get along" White woman named Katey (with blond hair and breast implants), throw in a studious, analytical Asian guy (with an accent and a calculator for the competitions) and for a little spice a Mambo loving Mexican guy with a beer belly. Sounds like reality TV to me.

What would America be without playing the Race Card? America was build on slavery (of Africans) and destruction of natives (First Nations), OJ beat murder charges by playing the race card, the JonBenet Ramsey case gets more attention then the rape and murder or other precious young children because she was blond and rich. I can tell you if she was an adorable little Indian girl who had been brutalized that way, John Karr would still be happily molesting children in Thailand (where so many pedophiles...er, I mean business men, go to vacation), not sipping champagne on a private plane on his way to a prison cell and the camera flashing attention of the American Media.

But then again can I blame Survivor, they're just uncreative TV execs trying to make a living, just like us. If you think about it racist cliche's (and sexual exploitation of women, children, cultures) are part of the fabric of our lives. How would the world survive without beating the dead horse called race? They sell cars, bank loans, music, television shows, films, wars, charities, clothing, simply by using race, well that's if the sex angle isn't strong enough. It's old, its tired, its disgusting but it is a money maker folks. And in the end isn't that what really matters in life?

Sigh...I guess you can say I'm just a tad bit angry...just a tad

OPRAH NEWS

On to good news Oprah just announced the first class of her South African girls Academy. 78 disadvantaged girls who showed academic and leadership potential were selected, the Academy will ultimately educate 450 girls once it opens next year. I loved hearing the little squeals of excitement when it was announced that they were the first group selected. One little girl, squealed "I can't wait for next year".

I wonder if Oprah is accepting 20 somethings in the Academy. I really think I have a lot to learn, plus graduating from Oprah's Academy will look really good on a resume...oh who am I kidding I'll just put it on anyway.

Previews for the next Blog

I'm currently reading Jimi Hendrix Bio, Room full of Mirrors. It's great!!!! Let's just say if I had been around in the Seventies, like an adult, I would of either been a Rock star, Rock Journalist or the best darn Rock Groupie alive! The Seventies musically were some of the most powerful, boundary breaking times, and bio's about those artists are some of my most enjoyable reads. Anyway, expect a Book Review of both the Jimi bio and Janis Joplin's bio, Love Janis in a week or so. Till then folks...

Popcorn ban....

Since one of my goals is to see as many films as possible before the Oscars air, I'm trying to come to terms with the inevitable fact that I will have to find a peaceful way to deal with one of my biggest pet peeves in life, noisy popcorn eating movie watchers.

I have a problem, big problem, with noisy popcorn eaters.

I won't lie, I enjoy the odd bag of popcorn now and then and despite popular belief I do not have a vendetta towards Mr. Orville Redenbacher. But to be perfectly blunt, when I am a rich screenwriting/actress, I will ban the eating of all popcorn or any other crunchy hard candy material at my red carpet screenings. I doubt they eat popcorn during red carpet screenings but since I don't know I am making it clear now. The only candy allowed in the theater will be Milk Duds (because there my favorite. It's my screening dammit). No hard mints, no gum, and never any popcorn.  Never!

Anyone who has ever watched a movie with me quickly realizes that I turn into the incredible hulk when the sound of popcorn crunching begins around me. I can be laughing and relaxed one moment but when that nauseating sound of popcorn being crunched in the back of someones mouth (right in the back of their teeth) starts going...I go off. I have sat during numerous films with my fingers in my ears, my jaw clenched, mumbling obscenities.

The final straw was last week when my screening of Walk the Line (read film review) was nearly destroyed by the #1 most annoying popcorn eater I have ever encounter in my life.

My friends and I arrived to the theater and quickly slipped into our seats just in time for the film to begin. A few minutes into the film a couple slipped in directly behind us. I already felt annoyed because I hate how the theater can be completely empty yet someone always finds a reason to sit behind me, in front of me, or worse ask me to move my bag so they can sit directly beside me, though there are rows of empty seats all around us, but I digress.

Right away I hear them begin to dig into their bag of popcorn. I breath and try to ignore it. My friend leans over and reminds me it usually dies down 30 minutes into the film (I guess she had timed it or something). I nod and return to the film.

The movie theater slowly becomes silent as the audience (having had their fill) starts putting aside the munchies. I want to sigh in relief but I can't, Mr. Loudly is still digging into his popcorn like a man who hasn't eaten for years.

An hour into the movie...he's crunching away. I begin to wonder how big this damn popcorn bag is?

At one point Johnny Cash is destroying his change room and the rage in me due to his endless crunching makes me feel like destroying a few things myself.

Finally, it's over an hour into the film and this guy is still going...what was this the bottomless bag of popcorn? I was so angry as I sat with my ears plugged that I wanted to turn around and shove the entire bag down his throat. I had been throwing back dirty looks for the past hour but it hadn't stopped him. I realized what was happening. The more frustrated I became the louder he ate. It wasn't going to end...he wouldn't let it end.

I had a choice, let him ruin the second half of the movie like he had ruined the first by sitting there with my ears plugged, or take a deep breath, remove my fingers, and keep my eyes on the screen. I choose the latter.

The film was wonderful (read my review) and I sat there happy that I had finally seen it. But as soon as the lights went up I dashed around in my seat to see who had been antagonizing me the entire night.

Right away his girlfriend looked at me apologetically. It wasn't her fault. I turned a little more to face him. He was trying to hide a smug little smile. I was about to say something to him when my friend Carole gently nudged me to stay quiet and politely exit. Which I did.

As I walked out the theater I looked over one more time, there he was looking at me chuckling. I gave him a dirty look and marched out. Oh, I hope a remember his butter stained face...one day...one sweet day....